You're Not Mature Enough!!

Could you even live to 50 in the 16th Century,
let alone be a badass Assassin?

Life is a grind, a pain in the ass, and takes hard work.  Sadly, that hard work can, and probably will, drive you nuts and there are few things in this world that make you feel better about having to accept that.  For me, I find release in gaming and reading about gaming.  So, after a long day of work and boring monotony I needed a lift.  Good news for me, I just got my copy of the latest issue of gameinformer (June 2011, issue 218).  I saw the cover that displayed what seems to be an aging Ezio Auditore da Firenze from Ubisoft Montreal's Assassin's Creed Revelations (I gave my thoughts on this recent game announcement in my previous blog post) and was instantly intrigued about this issue.  Regretfully, I didn't jump to that article, but decided to read from cover to cover (rare for me).  I only got as far as the reader feedback page.

Shut the Hell up and play your LEGO video games!!

Lo and behold, I come across the age old topic of "waaaaaahhhhhh, I'm 14 and I want to play Call of Duty: Black Ops and Grand Theft Auto IV, but my parents are meanyheads and won't let me play it because they think that I'm too impressionable, wwaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!"  This time, it was a parent's response that I was reading.  It was in response to a whiny child from 2 issues earlier.  I gotta say, I was impressed.  This parent, Jason, had some really solid points that I agree with: age appropriateness, gameplay time restrictions.  And he and his wife are gamers, so they understand the fun of gaming all around.

I guess it's just experience from my days as a Walmart cashier that makes me bitter towards the "Prayer of the Children" (music nerds might get that reference) when it comes to playing adult games.  I would constantly get parents coming up to the counter with what would seem to be a 9-year-old in tow.  And in the child's hands?  Anyone?  Anyone?  Bueller?   A copy of Grand Theft Auto IV or something to that tune.  The parent, fully involved in his/her cell phone, seemed completely oblivious to the ESRB rating on the game's front cover that stated "M FOR MATURE," meaning, anyone who hasn't had their voice cracking yet, probably isn't ready for this type of game.  I made a point of explaining to the child's parent that the game is full of theft, guns, sex, drugs, heavy language and all around adult mayhem and was really designed for a player around the age of around 16/17 and up, unless a parent feels their kid is mature enough to handle it.  Side note: if you have a 9-year-old and you think they're mature enough for this type of game, then you need to have a lobotomy.  This Walmart parent was in need of said procedure.  When I explained the game to her, she looked at me as though I had insulted her intelligence (which really doesn't take a great deal of effort in this case) and "explained" to me that I was nothing more than a clerk and didn't have the right to tell her what games her child should or should not be playing.  She bought the game, left and I got reported.  Happy time!!

Now, I'm not violent, aggressive, vulgar, nor, by any means, inappropriate in public.  Hell, you might say that I'm an all-around great guy.  But you give me a video game where the main purpose is to run around shooting the heads off of (usually) helpless digital victims, causing as much destruction and chaos, murder and mayhem while swearing and taking the Lord's name in vain... and I'm a kitten with a ball of yarn (without the adorable nature).  What does that mean?  Well, for one thing, it may mean that I have latent aggression issues that I only let out when I play video games and need some sort of psycho-therapy.  I don't know.  Maybe it could mean that, like a lot of people over the age of 18, I have a lot of stress in life that I need to vent, hence video games.  But it's the fact that even though I play games that are violent and vulgar, I still look at the news or movies like Saving Private Ryan and cringe about how people have to deal with REAL LIFE violence that exists today.  That means I am mature enough to know that while violent video games are fun and stress-relieving there is still real violence that people experience every day.  That's something I learned from my parents and from my friends that go through the real stuff.

Any questions?

Now, "maturity" isn't always reliant on age.  I get that and I understand that.  It is mainly dependent on how you act and/or react to certain situations.  But (as a once-education-major) I can tell you that your mind is most impressionable when it's in the early stages, aka before 18.  If you're below that age and doing incredibly horrid things with sticks to cats, dogs, llamas, birds, neighbors and your parents, then you're probably not mature enough for these types of  "M" rated games.

There's no fun left in playing "Cops and Robbers

 Your maturity level isn't based solely on your own interpretations of what maturity is.  It's based on your actions and how people view them.  That means, if you're thinking that you're mature enough for something and most people in the world can look at you and go, "NO! YOU'RE NOT!" then you're probably not.  Therefore, to this kid (dubbed "GI Issue 216," so I don't get sued or any of that crap) and all others that believe that their parents shouldn't be telling them what games they can or cannot play, grow up. Seriously!  Cry all you want and tantrum all you wish.  Parents get the final say.  And guess what... eventually you'll be old enough to buy these games, so get over it and deal.  Everyone else did.  Besides, if you're not mature enough to follow the wishes of your parents are you mature enough to handle a violent video game?  The Magic 8-Ball says, "Outlook is doubtful."